Some days ago, I introduced you to Bernadette, that pretty pink bear babe who suddenly entered my life on a dark day and brought so much light into it again.
Now, the same evening as I got her, our most favourite football team in the world –DCFC, Derby County Football Club– was playing another game in the English Championship, and against the odds we were hoping to win, something we hadn’t done during the last 8 games.
Well, you can’t live peacefully in a house where not all the occupants are football fans, and certainly not fans of the same team. So we decided to get Bear’nadette into DCFC, involving her with the sacred preparations of the game: DCFC hat on the head, DCFC scarf around the neck and DCFC mug for the milk coffee.
We encountered much resistance though. Our Babe wanted to wear and have only pink stuff, and certainly did not want to make a public appearance in all these black&white stripes and hoops. “They depress me!”, she said, “and they are not very feminine… I will look like a guy!“. To eventually get her consent I had to make her a gift: my little pink hippopotamus called “Socrates”. Also she insisted in having dotted and starred rainbow curtains hung by the window to bring some colours around her. And she didn’t want any milk coffee in her mug, “too boring”, she stated. We left her alone in the kitchen to mix her drink herself… don’t ask me what it is, but it did look very explosive! Some kind of Red Bull I suppose….
But all that was still not enough: moaning that her mug was too high to drink out of, she declared that my beloved little pink stool with the pencils and erasers legs was hers! Well, DCFC does deserve some big sacrifices…
And still, after all these concessions -my God, I am glad I never had children, they never give you any peace!- she still wanted to keep my pink New Orleans T-Shirt on, the one she stole off me the first day and has been wearing ever since. As I said it wouldn’t fit, she started crying: “I don’t want all these guys to see me naked!”. So we had to wrap her whole little body into the scarf, paying careful attention to entirely cover her young breasts. She seems to be a very prude girl, our Bear’nadette
Well, after all these initial difficulties, having installed Bear’nadette in front of the TV and reassured her million of times that she looked fabulous, we all had a wonderful and lucky football evening together: DCFC won the game, and Bear’nadette is now a fan!
To be totally honest, Bear’nadette did not look as pretty as in her pink clothes from the first day, less feminine somehow. But this is normal, isn’t it? Have you ever seen a pretty, feminine football fan? I just hope she won’t get too engaged into the game, as to me she already shows all the hallmarks of hooliganism… look at her watching the game!
And after all, I am glad that I gave her Socrates. He is her pet now, following her everywhere, too happy to have found a matching mistress. I must admit that I was very worried about him, he had started to have some anxiety crises recently, too much thinking about his little existence… and believe me, a depressed hippopotamus is not to joke with!
So here we are, the whole family happy again: DCFC because they have got a new fan, Bear’nadette because she has got a new pet, Socrates because he has got a new life, Miki, because she has got a new mug painting, and Kevin, who can’t stand sadness, because he has got a happy family again!
I am a little bit worried for the future though: It is tough to be a DCFC fan! I hope Bear’nadette has got iron nerves and unconditional optimism. If not, we are facing dark times again…
Also her prudery makes me wonder… what will happen when she reaches her puberty? I guess I better start telling her about the woman stuff soon…
And if you want to get a Giclee print of her portrait as DCFC, you can get one in many different dimensions, on paper or canvas, and also as greeting cards. Just click on the widget below to access my FAA Gallery